funny whatsapp status
Whatsapp Status

Funny WhatsApp Status – Short & Funniest Quotes for WhatsApp

Funniest WhatsApp Status: Most of people wants put there whatsapp status for funniest style .Here we have the best and rocking collection of funniest Whatsapp status for you, just check them out! Here is the best ever post completely overloaded by funny Whatsapp status, short funny quotes, and messages that are mostly liked by people around the world. Blow your mind with these funniest Whatsapp status!

Funny WhatsApp Status

Great power comes with great electricity bills.

I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

If I ever need a heart transplant, I’d want my ex’s. It’s never been used.

Dear problems… Please give me some discount… I’m your regular customer.

Life is too short. Don’t waste it removing pen drive safely.

If I won the award for laziness, I would send somebody to pick it up for me.

I like when you smile, but I love it when I’m the reason.

Hey, I’ll be back in five minutes. If I’m not, just read this message again.

It’s better to fail than to cheat but its better to cheat than to repeat.

I’m too shy at first but once I’m comfortable with you, get ready for some crazy shit.

The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.

I follow the quote, “Always be true to yourself” because I only lie to others!

Enjoy your life–there’s is plenty of time to be dead.

I’ve been diagnosed with “awesomeness.” You might want to get checked, but I doubt you caught it.

Whenever I find key to success, someone changes the lock.

Life is like an ice cream Enjoy it before it melts.

I follow the quote, “Always Be True To Yourself” because I only lie to others!

Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children.

Funniest One-line Whatsapp Status

Take my advice — I’m not using it.

I need 6 months’ vacation, twice a year.

The most important Shareholder in your life is you.

Marriage means silent suicide.

I am not stubborn, I am just always right.

Life is short smile while you still have teeth.

Is it vodka o’clock yet?

Marriage is the main cause of divorce.

Do you still hate me? I don’t care!

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

Yeah you’re really pretty, pretty stupid.

Open Books, Not Legs. Blow Minds, Not Guy.

You have the perfect face for radio.

Funniest WhatsApp Status In English

I’m too lazy to stop being lazy.

Never give up on your dreams keep sleeping.

I love my Haters, they make me Famous.

Me? Mature? I still laugh when the ketchup bottle “FARTS”.

I really want to work so hard. But being lazy is so much fun.

Make your weird light shine bright, so the other weirdos know where to find you.

Shopping is an art. I am an artist. Respect Please.

I stopped fighting with my inner demons. We are on the same side now.

I want someone to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.

I’m not single. I’m not taken. I’m simply on reserve for the one who deserves my heart.

In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision-maker.

I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people.

Life taught me a lot of lessons but I banked those classes.

Everyone wants to park their vehicles in shade but no one wants to grow trees.

Any room is a panic room if you’ve lost your phone in it.

It must be difficult to post inspirational status when your blood type is B Negative.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

My drug test came back negative. My dealer sure has some explaining to do.

Stop thinking too much, it’s all right not to know all the answers.

If you smile when no one is around, you really mean it?

As long as there are tests, there will be prayers in schools.

When everything’s coming your way, you are in the wrong lane.

I fell in love at first sight. I should have looked twice.

If you are BAD then I am your DAD.

Yes, of course, I am athletic… I surf the Internet every day.

Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up.

I don’t get older, I level up.

Life is like ice cream, enjoy it before it melts.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.

I’m not fat, I’m just easy to see. (Funny WhatsApp Status)

We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a workstation.

The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once!

Save water drink beer.

I love my job only when I’m on vacation…..

The only time SUCCESS comes before WORK is in Dictionary.

Funny Whatsapp Status Ideas

Keep moving! Nothing new to read…

I would lose weight, but I hate losing.

Every Whatsapp status is a secret message for someone.

Never laugh at your wife’s choices. You’re one of them.

I just asked my husband if he remembers what today is… Scaring men is easy.

I don’t go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me.

You can either be right, or you can be the husband.

I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people but none of them work.

They say “Love is in the air.” Maybe that’s why there is so much air pollution these days.

Who needs television when there is so much drama on Whatsapp?

They say good things take time… that’s why I’m always late.

I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true.

Treat me like a joke and I’ll leave you like it’s funny. (Funny WhatsApp Status)

People say I act like I don’t care. It’s not an act.

Mosquitos are like family. Annoying but they carry your blood.

I’m not a photographer, but I can picture me and you together.

Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can’t see.

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life unless I buy something.

If you don’t succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried.

Save paper, Don’t do homework.

Take care of your status, don’t be caretaker of my status.

I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision-maker.

Yesterday I did nothing and today I’m finishing what I did yesterday.

Funniest WhatsApp Status Message

Zombies are looking for brains. Don’t worry, you’re safe.

Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?

Don’t worry about what I’m doing, worry about why you’re worried about what I’m doing.

Life is all about perspective. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the ship’s kitchen.

People said to follow your dreams so I went back to bed.

Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time.

Never make the same mistake twice, There are so many new ones, Try a different one each day.

On the internet you can be anything you want, it’s strange that so many people choose to be stupid.

My girlfriend is always stealing my t-shirts and sweaters… But if I take a single one of her dresses, suddenly “we need to talk.”

Funniest WhatsApp Status Quotes

Life is onetime offers use it well.

I’m cool but global warming made me hot.

I’m on a whiskey diet…I’ve lost three days already.

Follow your heart but take your brain with you.

A woman’s mind is cleaner than a man’s: She changes it more often.

Dear Karma, I have a list of people you missed.

80% of boys have a girlfriend and rest have a brain.

Apparently I snore so loudly that it scares everyone in the car I’m driving.

Well I could agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.

My wallet is like onion, opening it makes me cry.

If I’d shot you sooner, I’d be out of jail by now.

I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.